I love my mom, see. And that's good. But she has a screwed-up pancreas. That's bad. But someone did a study on my family a few years ago and located the gene responsible for the screw-up, and that's good. But it got passed along to me. That's bad. Because it means I have pancreatitis, and that's baaaad. Stupid prematurely activated trypsinogen is very bad. Except that it's not stupid because it has no brain. But it does get activated too early because my protein that keeps it from doing that is a mutated underachiever. Bad. But as a result, my mutated family has enough painkillers to start our own drug ring, which is good because they help the pain. But we don't have a drug ring, because that would be illegal and bad.

And that's all.

Ow.

Wait.

Also, owwwwwwwWWWWW!