Why does Ferro Roche hate my cat?

I have an obese, arthritic black cat with social anxiety disorder. Well, he's definitely obese and has arthritis due to the obesity, but I diagnosed the social anxiety disorder myself. Anyway, there's only 1.75 people who don't cause him to slink out of the room in horror, and that would be my mom, my dad 25% of the time, and me 50% of the time. If someone rings the doorbell, we don't see him for the rest of the day (he flees under a bed and then goes to sleep.) Even the Domino's commercials scare him.

Last week, I was innocuously watching TNT (all Law & Order, all the time!) and a commercial for Ferro Roche chocolate came on. This evil commercial features a jolly chorus of "Deck the Halls", featuring solos on the ... DOORBELL. So it's about 20 seconds of nothing but doorbell. My poor cat had approximately 14 cardiac arrests.

Why? Why are they trying to kill my cat? Meanwhile, while this atrocity is allowed to proceed, PETA is busy telling me that fish are interesting and intelligent individuals.

I have not fallen off the face of the earth, just in case anyone is interested. (Come on, SOMEBODY pretend to be interested!) I was out of town visiting family for a few days, and I haven't been able to get back into blogging mode yet. I'm working on it.

Anyway, I hope everybody had a great Thanksgiving, full of beef-less trifles.

Blue states are boycotting red states?

I just found this on a Yahoo message board for the article: FBI Reports 14 Murders Among 7,489 Hate Crimes

My jaw almost hit the floor. Are we not still all Americans? A ploy like this would hurt us ALL. And these are supposed to be the super-educated, intelligent, open-minded and productive members of our country? If so, then we are in trouble. These are probably the same people who praise Yasser Arafat and condemn the Marine who shot a terrorist. I'm actually at a loss for words about this.

Boycott Red States
Check labels for origination and distribution locations. Buy alternative to food products from states like California, Washington state, Oregon, New York state. Start a letter writing campaign to let business interests in red states know their products are being targeted for a boycott. Re-electing a cut-taxes and spend president is causing an economic burden on America. Share the experience with our red state brethren. I also recommend that people in blue states write their legislators to push in Congress against using their tax dollars to fund red state welfare programs. Vacation in the blue states. Deny tourism dollars to red states.

Here is a short list of blue state online tourism guides:

• Washington State: http://www.tourism.wa.gov/
• Oregon:http://www.traveloregon.com/index.cfm
• Delaware:http://www.visitdelaware.com/
• New York State:http://www.iloveny.state.ny.us/
• New York City:http://www.nyc.com/
• Hawaii:http://www.hawaii.com/
• Pennsylvania:link
• Michigan :http://www.travel.michigan.org/

Retailers:

• Target*, Sears, Kmart, Meijer, BestBuy, Farmer Jack, State Farm, Dunkin’
  Donuts are BLUE
• Walmart, Sam's Club, Circuit City, Kroger, Wachovia are RED

Boycott Red State hams this holiday season, too. Here's a delicious Vermont ham: http://www.harringtonham.com/index.cfm

Most pet foods are produced in Red States. Try Wellness brand foods, made in Lowell, MA, and give your pet a real treat. http://www.omhpet.com/index.asp

Blue Gasoline Retailers:
As long as we're paying the big bucks for gas - might as well spend it to BLUE business. The Blue Gas Companies: Amoco, Arco, Chevron, Occidental, Petroleum, Sun Oil Company (Sunoco), Unocol, BP, Total

Most of the most commonly seen gas stations are headquartered in Texas, and less obviously, Oklahoma, Kentucky, Virginia, and Ohio.

Netscape, AOL, BLUE. Linux, BLUE. Don't forget my beloved Apple Computer! As true BLUE as they come. YEAH! GOODY!

And Janeane Garofalo said on Sean Hannity's radio show the other day that the Bush-supporters are the angry ones? Holy Moses! I don't know ... I just don't know what's going to happen as a result of this election. I really don't. I'm afraid of what these irrational people will do.

Loooooooooons!

I have something appalling to share, but a little background information is required first.

Embarrassingly enough, back in the spring of 2003 during American Idol 2, I found myself among a group of Clay Aiken fans posting on the excellent Television Without Pity forums. (Shut up, he has a beautiful voice.) Anyway, after the show ended, there was a little skirmish in the fandom, and it splintered into the crazily intense fans, and the unintense fans who refused to venerate him. The unintense group basically continued to chat with each other, casually follow Clay's career if time permitted, and there was also a chicken involved. Ahem. But watching the crazy group has been an interesting study in psychology and how a "group mentality" can really encourage more and more crazy behavior. I remember last year around Thanksgiving and Christmas, people were posting about how their families were planning intervention-like things to address their obsessive fandom, and everyone else would tell them that their family just didn't understand Clay Aiken and his "relationship" with his fans, and blah blah and blah.

The thing is, a lot of them seem to be quite intelligent, but it's just so misguided. For example, Clay Aiken has written a book. A memoir, nonetheless, which I think is hilarious because he's only 25, about a month older than I am, and I only have an "m" towards having a "memoir". At most, an "m" and half of an "e". At the moment, their project is calculating sales figures, because they worry about poor Clay Aiken. Will he sell enough CDs/books/concert tickets? Are he and his dog going to sit in his mansion and starve to death? To quell their anxiety, they like to speculate. Today, someone sent me this insanely detailed post:

Assuming a print run of 230k copies:

Per unit cost: $690,000 (230k x $3.10)
Fixed costs: $12,000
Advance: $1,000,000
Total Out-of-pocket costs (including advance): $1,702,000 [no ... I haven’t forgotten overhead ... I’ll factor it in later]

Income:

I found an article from 1998 which claimed that the average trade discount was between 47% and 48%. I’m inclined to think the 48% margin is a fair figure to use since I also found a 2003 interview with an independent bookseller that claimed the standard margin is 40%. The big chains get a bigger discount, as do distributors, and I expect they account for the biggest segment of the market. What the 48% figure means is that the publisher would sell the books at an average discount of 48%, and would therefore receive 52% of the list price for every copy sold. LTS has a list price of $21.95, so the publisher would collect $11.41 per copy. At that rate, LTS would have to sell 149,168 copies to break even on out-of-pocket costs of $1,702,000. [149,168 x $11.41 = $1,702,006.88]

Remember the 33% (*shudder*) overhead? We’ll factor it in now, since it’s calculated on sales rather than costs. LTS would have to sell 222,638 copies to break even on out-of-pocket costs plus 33% overhead:

Gross income: $2,540,299.58 (222,638 x $11.41)
Overhead (33% of gross income): $838,298.86
Out of pocket costs: $1,702,000
Total Costs: $2,540,298.86

See, I think these people could have done lots of volunteer work, or at least something productive, and really given back to society. Maybe even cured a disease or two. I probably could have finished my thesis in the amount of time they spent researching all of that loony math. Instead, their kids are eating lint and their husbands have thrown in the towel after 18 months of having one-sided conversations with the lump in front of the computer chair who is clad in head-to-toe Clay Aiken garb and surrounded by empty Cheetos bags and beef stick wrappers. And a calculator. And Clay Aiken CDs, of course! If you don't have 15 copies on your person at all times, to hand out unsolicited to random people, then you are a terrible fan.

Ack. I REALLY tend to ramble when I get on the topic of loony Clay Aiken fans. I wonder if it's just his fandom or fandoms in general that are so crazy? I've never been in the midst of another fandom, so I don't know. But I can't imagine a group that would top these people.

Disclaimer: There are people on that board that are sane. But they're few and far between, and they tend to get lost among the crazy.

Will the real evangelical Christian conservative please stand up and screech about it? Or, just declare what you are by your actions, not your words.

On GOP Bloggers (formerly B4B) today, they submit Exhibit A in the case of Hillary vs. the "Idiot" Conservatives. Actually, it's a case of Hillary doing serious pandering to Christian conservatives and counting on all of us being morons.

"I always take time to worship God in as evangelical a way as is feasible, given time and location constraints. As you know, I consider myself an evangelical Christian, really a Christian conservative, if you want to know the truth, so it's nice to be 'home' again in the South, which I really consider my quote-unquote home even though I live in New York most of the time. Well, Washington, D.C., most of the time, actually, but if I'm not there I'm in New York, of course, but always thinking about being here, in the South, where I shared so many wonderful evangelical. . . moments and . . . events." [emphasis added]

Huh? And also, HUH? I checked her record on OntheIssues.org, and thought the following stances in particular were very unorthodox for an evangelical Christian conservative in the south:

VoteMatch Responses

VoteMatch Question & Answer (Click on question for explanation and background)

Based on these stances (Click on topic for excerpt & citation) --

Favors topic 1: Abortion is a woman's right (7 points on Social scale)

• Must safeguard constitutional rights, including choice: Favors topic 1
• Rated 100% by NARAL, indicating a pro-choice voting record: Strongly Favors topic 1
• Expand embryonic stem cell research: Favors topic 1
• NO on banning partial birth abortions except for maternal life: Strongly Favors topic 1
• NO on criminal penalty for harming unborn fetus during other crime: Favors topic 1

Strongly Favors topic 3: Sexual orientation protected by civil rights laws (10 points on Social scale)

• Gays deserve domestic partnership benefits: Strongly Favors topic 3
• More funding and stricter sentencing for hate crimes: Strongly Favors topic 3
• YES on adding sexual orientation to definition of hate crimes: Strongly Favors topic 3

Opposes topic 4: Permit prayer in public schools (7 points on Social scale)

• Rated 0% by the Christian Coalition: an anti-family voting record: Strongly Opposes topic 4

Strongly Opposes topic 8: Death Penalty (10 points on Social scale)

• Require DNA testing for all federal executions: Strongly Opposes topic 8

Favors topic 9: Mandatory Three Strikes sentencing laws (2 points on Social scale)

• End hate crimes and other intolerance: Favors topic 9

Strongly Opposes topic 10: Absolute right to gun ownership (0 points on Social scale)

• Limit access to weapons; look for early warning signs: Opposes topic 10
• Gun control protects our children: Strongly Opposes topic 10
• Don’t water down sensible gun control legislation: Strongly Opposes topic 10
• NO on banning lawsuits against gun manufacturers for gun violence: Strongly Opposes topic 10

Strongly Opposes topic 15: More spending on armed forces (10 points on Economic scale)

• Rated 100% by SANE, indicating a pro-peace voting record: Strongly Opposes topic 15

Strongly Favors topic 17: Seek UN approval for military action (0 points on Economic scale)

Strongly Opposes topic 19: Drug use is immoral: enforce laws against it (10 points on Social scale)

So, since I think of myself as an evangelical Christian conservative (conservative on social issues, but I'm more of an economic moderate) and Hillary and I disagree on almost everything, then one of us is mistaken about what we are. But I agree with Michael in MI over at GOP Bloggers:

This is the difference between people who are something and who are not something. Those who are something, are that way because they work on their character through their actions and how they live their lives. Those who are not something, are that way because they work more on their reputation through empty works and lack of substantial action.

The office of the President of the United States is an office of character and action. Anyone running without these qualities will never win the office. And the American public is too smart now for anyone to get away with pretending to have these qualities.

Yep.

Just to update, it appears that this was satire posted on National Review Online. Oooops. However, that does make much more sense. I couldn't believe she'd do such obvious pandering!

Also, I included her positions on some things, like gun control, the military, and the UN, as part of the point that her views would be unorthodox for an evangelical conservative Christian in the SOUTHERN United States. Emphasis on the "southern" for those things, rather than the "evangelical conservative Christian". Although I don't know of anywhere that the Bible speaks against owning weapons (obviously not firearms, because they weren't invented at the time, but not any other weapons either). If anyone knows of a "thou shalt not join the NRA", or anything of the sort, please let me know! Just a little humor, there -- but I really would like to know of a passage that speaks against weapon ownership. (Not using weapons, obviously, because I know that's in there, but owning them.)

People should wear pants.

Yesterday, I went by the mall on my way home from work, since it was actually early enough that the mall was still open. I was wandering around in Buckle, when I saw a girl walk by who didn't appear to be wearing pants. I was trying to figure out how to glance without glancing, how to look without looking, thinking that maybe she was just wearing some flesh-toned leggings or something. She walked by again, and the pantslessness was confirmed. Apparently, she was trying on jeans and needed a different size, so she just walked out and got them. Without pants.

And it took her a very long time to browse around to find more to try on. I felt like I had walked into a Ray Stevens song. Of course, she was very pretty and in great shape, and if I looked like that, maybe I'd shop in a T-shirt and panties too. Except that I wouldn't, because in public, people should wear pants or something similar.

I couldn't compliment her pants because she wasn't wearing any. I couldn't ask her where she bought her pants because SHE WASN'T WEARING ANY. She wasn't wearing these, these, or these. Not these, these, or these. Not even this!

No pants, people. Walking around Buckle, without pants. It'll take me awhile to stop being appalled. Boogity, boogity.

Selective Deletion

I wish that I could selectively delete information from my brain. As I was cleaning some clutter from my hard drive, I thought how nice it would be if we had a "temporary" file in our brain that we could just dump into the Recycle Bin at will. I just think about all the things that I am unable to remember, probably because valuable brain space (I may know the scientific term for that one of these days) is being occupied by the fact that Jack Osbourne loves him some Mary Kate Olsen, the lyrics to "I Love You Period" by Dan Baird, Val Kilmer's birthday, and various lines from Look Who's Talking.

I linked to olsen-twins.org up there. I think a small part of me just died.

I found this on Powerline via GOP Bloggers, and like GOP Bloggers, I'm just going to quote the entire thing.

This is one story of many that people normally don't hear, and one that everyone does.

This is one most don't hear:

A young Marine and his cover man cautiously enter a room just recently filled with insurgents armed with Ak-47's and RPG's. There are three dead, another wailing in pain. The insurgent can be heard saying, "Mister, mister! Diktoor, diktoor(doctor)!" He is badly wounded, lying in a pool of his own blood. The Marine and his cover man slowly walk toward the injured man, scanning to make sure no enemies come from behind. In a split second, the pressure in the room greatly exceeds that of the outside, and the concussion seems to be felt before the blast is heard. Marines outside rush to the room, and look in horror as the dust gradually settles. The result is a room filled with the barely recognizable remains of the deceased, caused by an insurgent setting off several pounds of explosives.

The Marines' remains are gathered by teary eyed comrades, brothers in arms, and shipped home in a box. The families can only mourn over a casket and a picture of their loved one, a life cut short by someone who hid behind a white flag. But no one hears these stories, except those who have lived to carry remains of a friend, and the families who loved the dead. No one hears this, so no one cares.

This is the story everyone hears:

A young Marine and his fire team cautiously enter a room just recently filled with insurgents armed with AK-47's and RPG's. There are three dead, another wailing in pain. The insugent can be heard saying, "Mister, mister! Diktoor, diktoor(doctor)!" He is badly wounded. Suddenly, he pulls from under his bloody clothes a grenade, without the pin. The explosion rocks the room, killing one Marine, wounding the others. The young Marine catches shrapnel in the face.

The next day, same Marine, same type of situation, a different story. The young Marine and his cover man enter a room with two wounded insurgents. One lies on the floor in puddle of blood, another against the wall. A reporter and his camera survey the wreckage inside, and in the background can be heard the voice of a Marine, "He's moving, he's moving!"

The pop of a rifle is heard, and the insurgent against the wall is now dead. Minutes, hours later, the scene is aired on national television, and the Marine is being held for commiting a war crime. Unlawful killing. And now, another Marine has the possibility of being burned at the stake for
protecting the life of his brethren. His family now wrings their hands in grief, tears streaming down their face. Brother, should I have been in your boots, i too would have done the same.

For those of you who don't know, we Marines, Band of Brothers, Jarheads, Leathernecks, etc., do not fight because we think it is right, or think it is wrong. We are here for the man to our left, and the man to our right. We choose to give our lives so that the man or woman next to us can go home and see their husbands, wives, children, friends and families.

For those of you who sit on your couches in front of your television, and choose to condemn this man's actions, I have but one thing to say to you. Get out of your recliner, lace up my boots, pick up a rifle, leave your family behind and join me. See what I've seen, walk where I have walked. To those of you who support us, my sincerest gratitude. You keep us alive.

I am a Marine currently doing his second tour in Iraq. These are my opinions and mine alone. They do not represent those of the Marine Corps or of the US military, or any other.

I am sick of hearing everyone condemning this Marine without hearing the whole story. And I'm sick of hearing from the left (particularly the Hollywood left, who are so good at criticizing from behind their guarded mansion gates) about how evil America is, how George W. Bush ran his own jihad, how we are the same as the terrorists, and then, seeing this individual joining ranks with Osama and saying that we should all be blown to bits? I've had it! America has been a great force of good in the world, and we continue to be. I really like this quote from an article on by Aaron Goldstein on Intellectual Conservative:

Rather than praising our country and its values, it apologizes for them and embraces the likes of Noam Chomsky and Howard Zinn, who do not hesitate to liken us to the Nazis while praising the Pol Pots, Fidel Castros and Yasser Arafats of the world. Isn’t it interesting that the people who praise communism are people who never had to live in a communist state?

[snip]

George W. Bush believes that America is worth fighting for while John Kerry believes we should feel guilty about the power we have and apologize to the world by not using it.

I am still proud to be an American, and I am still so proud of our troops. God blessed America!

Comments are enabled, hooray!

Hooray! I finally fixed my code that was rudely shutting would-be comment-ers. So comment! Comment away! Talk to me! I thought that I rendered everyone speechless, or made everyone mad, or bored everyone to sleep, or something.

At any rate, comments work now. Yay!

World Toilet Summit 2004, baby! I would so buy a T-shirt to remember that experience.

Dang, I'm afraid I found out about this too late to get a flight. In observance of World Toilet Day, November 19th, people from all over the world are converging on Bejing for the World Toilet Summit 2004. I found the link at Best of the Web, and I cannot stop giggling at this website for the Summit.

Things like their Contest page (the idea that they have a contest page is funny enough by itself, but I'm completely amused by the actual contests):

Contest One: "Eureka!" Toilet Improvement Ideas Contest Starts on 1st January 2002 and ends on 31st March 2002.

"Oh Yes! I've a new toilet invention!!"

Ever come across an amazing toilet idea when you least expect it? Ever question "Would it is be better if the toilets are manage in this way?"

Ever dream about "If they should have this thing in the toilet, I would be having a much wonderful experience." If you have, let us hear it.

20 winning entries will be selected. Each winner wins a 'Mysterious' Toilet Gift.
Submit your invention, new management system, or even a new idea on toilet now ... before it's lost!

Well, crap (no pun intended) I've missed the deadline by 2 1/2 years. Oh well. I'm not sure I've ever come across an amazing toilet idea that made me go, "Oh Yes! I've a new toilet invention!!" anyway. And I can't decide if I'd be horrified by a 'mysterious' toilet gift or love to see what it would be. Hm.

Now, I realize that elsewhere in the world, the entire bathroom is referred to as a toilet. But just let me keep the idea that the centerpiece of this summit is the actual fixture itself, because it's funnier that way.

I'm not evil after all!

Today, Netscape's homepage had a link to a quiz to test your level of eeeeeeevilness. Since I've been reading some commentary by lefty authors lately, I expected to break the thing, seeing as how I voted for Bush and that means I must be off-the-charts evil. Or maybe not so much. See?

It called me Milquetoast! That couldn't be right. Or could it??? Do you suppose I accidentally voted for Kerry/Edwards??? It's the only possible explanation, considering Bush voters = evil. Of course, it also called me "Mr." which is definitely not right.

This is a tough letter to write.

I was so preoccupied with all of the election-related excitement that I totally forgot to let you know (you, yes YOU, all two readers of my blog!) that I was accepted to medical school. Again. Yay for me! And also, yay for God, because He is the only reason that I am able to do anything that's good. He's given me this insatiable interest in human anatomy/physiology and human disease (particularly infectious disease) and He's also given me the opportunity to get an education and the ability to get through all the classes that I've taken. All I do is a lot of showing up, believe me! Most of the time, I shock myself by understanding and retaining material from my classes.

I'm especially interested in infectious diseases, because I think it's just remarkable that a human, an extremely complex organism, can be totally taken down by a single-celled bacterium.

Anyway, I'm wildly excited about starting school. I feel like my brain has been getting dusty, and that I've just been spinning my wheels since I finished my four semesters of full-time graduate work (I'm WORKING on my thesis, okay???? At least theoretically.) Now, I feel like I'm finally starting down the path that I was meant to take, and I have this peace about it. I hope that I can live up to everyone's expectations of me (including God's!)

So I have to send my acceptance letter by Saturday, taking the school up on their offer of a position in the class, and I'm having a terrible time writing it. I'm pretty sure that something like, "I'll take it!" wouldn't be appropriate. In a brief moment of desperation, I considered, "To Whom it May Concern: I've applied and been accepted twice. I think I'll give it one more go, to test the precision of your admissions process." Well, that's no good either.

I'll figure something out. In the meantime, here's my Halloween costume:




I'm the dark-haired one. Except that isn't my real hair. My real hair would have taken up approximately 75% of the picture, on account of the Florida humidity. And after traipsing around in those shoes all night, my cousin and I concluded that flappers did NOT go to amusement parks. Owwwwwww!

There were also these guys walking around the Magic Kingdom on huge stilts (their feet were up higher than my head) and when they saw us, they'd say, "Roxie and Velma!" Or, "She had it coming!" Hee.

My, what a disjointed post. Purple Monkey Dishwasher!

Woo hoo, a party!

Heeeeeeeee. From The Rinse Cycle:

You are Invited!!!!!

Due to the cancellation of the Inaugural Ball for Senator Kerry, there will be a small soiree (pity party) for those who have already bought their attire.

The night's entertainment will be provided by the DIXIE CHICKS & Bruce Springsteen.

Tissues for excessive self pity will be furnished by Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins.

We are pleased to announce DAN RATHER will be our Master of Ceremonies!!! Yay!!!!

Cameron Diaz has pledged CUPCAKES!!

Whats this? A Free Screening of Fahrenheit 911! Thank you Michael Moore.

Ashton Kutcher will sign his latest book, "I Open My Mouth ... and Stupid Falls Out" (BWAH. That's my favorite!)

P Diddy will not be in attendance, he is still trying to get the vote out. If you see him tell him that he was not "disenfranchised" from this event. He can come home now.

Barbara Streisand is preparing for her next role and will not be here (boohoo!) She will be starring as Teresa Heinz Kerry in the sad story of "Shoveit".

Just in ... grapes will be provided by the Heinz Corporation. Sorry, only SOUR available.

The Reverend Jesse Jackson will be cooking on the BBQ and John Kerry will be flippin the burgers -- something he has proven to be very good at. Lots of ketchup, folks! The White House has donated thousands of bottles, along with relish, mustard, and all the pickles too. When asked why the generosity, the spokesman for the Bush Household told us, "We have switched to Del Monte, thank you very much."

Attention all actors: Norman Lear is casting for his new television show, "Fahrenheit 11-2-04: How'd the GOP Do That?"

Hope to see you all there! There's not much else going on.

HILLARY

I am having a ridiculous amount of fun with this:

Autorantic Virtual Moonbat

Sean Gleeson has gone above and beyond to help supply rants to keep conspiracy theorists in constant supply by "invent[ing] the Autorantic Virtual Moonbat. This spiffy gizmo knows all the theories, and will help you to rant 73 percent more efficiently than the old-fashioned way of typing in stuff. There are over 4.4 billion possible rants, or roughly 1.5 million for every reader of this blog, so don't worry about sounding like everybody else."

Also, it appears that I'm a published photographer. Someone took two pictures that I took at an American Idol concert (shut up) during the summer of 2003 and crashed them together to make a wallpaper. That was all fine and good. But then, someone else took that wallpaper and apparently included it in a book -- Clay Aiken: Everything You've Ever Wanted to Know About the Singing Sensation, by Gaye Deamer. That's funny, I don't recall giving permission to use my images! But oh well. I'm sure the scores of loony, loony fans will buy 1,228 copies each (approximately) and make the book a very (unauthorized) lucrative venture for Gaye Deamer. And then, they'll all marry Clay Aiken and have 10,000 of his babies. Ack.

Appropriate captions for sorry people.

Hee. Jim Treacher is captioning the most amusingly appalling pictures of the sorry people.

I hope that Chirac et al. stop fawning over Arafat long enough to see a site like this, We're Not Sorry, in addition to the one created by those who are more interested in what the rest of the world thinks than what is best for America. I voted for Bush and I am NOT apologizing for it. I generally regard Bill Maher as nonsensical and annoying, but I have to echo his response to that ridiculous British headline: "Who asked ye?" Heh.

Hey, is that Alec Baldwin? What's he still doing here? I thought he was leaving back in 2000. Maybe he's having trouble making ends meet? Glenn Beck may be able to help him out with a ticket, I hear he's charitable that way.

If we didn't overuse and misuse antibiotics, we wouldn't have this problem.

This really is scary. And, another reason to stay away from the gym! Yippee!

In other news, apparently there is some sort of carbon monoxide problem at my high school alma mater. There's a comment regarding it in the Gripe Line of the county "newspaper" that is just tickling me to death:

I don’t think that Guyan Valley children should have to go to Guyan Valley with carbon dioxide going through the vents and making all of them sick. I think the fire marshal should do something about it or close the school.

Oh, the horror! Carbon dioxide! Well, we can't have that. The school should be evacuated! While they're investigating, they should check for oxygen and nitrogen too.

Don't kill me because I'm a Republican. No really. Please don't. That would be v. "intolerant".

Geez-o-pete, this person on Bill Maher's forums (and all the crazy posts that follow) better be kidding:

At this point in time, would it be morally defensible to apply a "final solution" to republicans? Let's face it, when Grover Norquist is doing the media rounds...when his agenda of eliminating all taxes on billionaires and letting the poor pay all taxes and carry the debt burdon, and let them scounge around in the garbage for food...builds character.....when THIS type of criminal extreme right wing "thought" is entering the mainstream...it's time for extreme action.

GW Bush and the American right wing Taliban are endangering the entire planet. If the rest of the world had a say, Bush and Cheney would be in jail. Is it now morally excusable to organize midnight raids on republican groups in the red states and "terminate" them with extreme prejudice? Watching Bush's acceptance speech on wednesday, with the Cheney's on stage as well....who would not have liked to see a bomb go off under the stage and wipe out the whole despicable slimy lot of them? And hopefully the shrapnel would have gone to the second deck and blown Mary Matalin's head off as well. Be honest. Who would not like to see Karen Hughes run over by an 18 wheel truck? Who wouldn't like to see her carcass scattered all over highway 99?

These are the people who are bemoaning a "lack of democracy"? (Heh, I accidentally typed 'democrazy'. Appropriate.) Who are upset over lives lost in Iraq? Who are calling Bush supporters hypocrites??? Who supported all of these "nonpartisan" get-out-the-vote efforts? Well, I'm in the "young voters" category, and I voted, but since you don't approve of my vote, you think you're justified to KILL me? Sheesh! Also, aren't these the people who think we should be "tolerant" of anything and everything? Except Bush supporters, I guess. Part of this country seems to have gone completely off the deep end. Lord, please keep us safe!

Okay, back to add that I can be completely disturbed by someone who is hanging off the edge of the left fringe, and then read something like An Average American's Letter to Michael Moore, and be so amused that it makes me feel better. I still hope no one kills me or any other Republicans, though. Gee, wouldn't that be one of those hate crimes you guys are always talking about?

I am not a homophobic, intolerant, hateful, religious kook.

Like I said in yesterday's post, I'm still having trouble finding a place to start commenting on all of the post-election discussion that's going on. I want to defend my vote for George W. Bush and give my reasons behind that vote. Reading endless op-ed pieces, forum postings, and other writings that furiously call me a bigoted, hypocritical, hateful, fascist, intolerant, ignorant, homophobic, fanatical religious kook, is disheartening to say the least. I am none of those things. Since most of the insults that the left is flinging at the evangelicals who voted for Bush refer to the same-sex marriage issue, I'll address that one first. And since I read a forum post the other day that said that there's no argument against same-sex marriage that is not a religious argument, I'll do it without mentioning God or the Bible or sin -- watch.

First of all, the Constitution protects individuals from discrimination. As INDIVIDUALS, I think that homosexuals should have the same basic human rights as everyone else. They should not be injured, killed or wrongfully imprisoned. They shouldn't be denied an education or a job for which they are as equally qualified as other competitive applicants. Their RELATIONSHIP, however, isn't protected by the Constitution. The government only gets involved in durable relationships between one man and one woman because these relationships produce and nurture the next generation. It has nothing to do with "validating love", because there are all kinds of loving relationships that the government stays out of. It is in the government's best interest to encourage a man and a woman to stay together to raise their children, by offering tax credits and such to lessen the financial burden that children bring. A mother and a father enrich a child's life in specific ways that the other just can't. Men and women are obviously different -- our brains are different, our musculature is different -- women are just built to be able to do some things more effectively than men, and vice versa.

Throughout my childhood, when I was sick, Mom would stay awake with me while I had my head in a garbage can, and Dad slept so he could run my family's grocery store the next day to pay the medical bill. Dad just couldn't comfort me the way that Mom could, and Mom just didn't have the even temperament that is required to operate a lucrative business. I would not be the person I am today without both of them -- not if I had had only one, and not if I had had two Moms or two Dads.

By encouraging families to stay together, the government is doing what it can to take care of the next generation while that generation is not yet able to take care of itself. It is trying to prevent crime and drug problems, which are drains on government resources, and that often result when children are the product of a broken home.

And just because some married couples are childless doesn't change the fact that the purpose of marriage, as far as the government is concerned, is to produce and nurture the next generation. Just because a house that I pass on my morning commute chooses to use a car as a lawn ornament, that does not change the fact that a car's purpose is transportation.

The thing that I don't understand is that homosexuals already have many of the benefits that married couples have. They can have a ceremony where they declare their love and commitment in front of their family and friends, with a cake and reception and gifts and all of that, followed by a honeymoon. They can buy property together and live together. They can include each other in their wills and have power of attorney. They can adopt in some areas. They can change their name and buy rings and have anniversaries and be each other's lifelong companion. During the flurry of "marriages" last winter, I remember reading the story of one ecstatic couple, and one of them mentioned that piece of paper, the marriage license. I can only conclude that this is the real issue here. That piece of paper says that the government, and the people it governs, approve of the union and consider it to be valid. It says that the homosexual relationship contributes the same things to society that a heterosexual marriage does.

So the main problem I have with the idea of same-sex marriage (and I know I've said this in an earlier post, but I'll repeat it anyway) aside from any religious convictions I have regarding homosexuality, is that it says that marriage doesn't mean anything in particular. It makes marriage one of those things that we can define and redefine on a whim. It says that children don't deserve a mother AND a father. And with the help of hate-crime legislation and the ACLU, members of society can't express our views about this action, this redefining of the relationship that forms the foundation of our culture, without hearing terms like "bigot", "hypocrite", "homophobe", or "intolerant" in response to our argument. I feel like my hands are tied as I watch a few use a twisted version of the law to force the acceptance of a practice that is being defeated overwhelmingly in state after state. The majority does not want to redefine marriage. We understand that while it may be YOUR life, the policy it requires does affect everyone. To replace a foundational element of our society with a substitute element that is incapable of serving the same purpose will eventually cause the entire structure to become shaky. Like I said in a previous post, it's like replacing one lung with a paper bag and expecting the entire body to escape unscathed. It will not, and we will not.

Incidentally, the Constitution protects individuals from discrimination, not from criticism. I do not hate homosexuals or wish ill upon them. I simply don't agree with their lifestyle, but that's not the same thing as hate. I'm not afraid of them as people. What I am afraid of is the idea that unelected judges and a few activist groups can force a practice upon society that the people, when allowed to vote on the issue, overwhelmingly disagree with. I am afraid of the redefining of words like "marriage" and "family" that have had essentially the same meaning since the beginning of recorded history. I feel like my hands are tied because speaking against this practice will cause some to label me as an intolerant bigot. Maybe I should clasp them instead.

And one more thing ... those who are predicting that "minorities and women are next" in the whole "discrimination against homosexuals" smokescreen? That won't happen, because the people who disagree with the principle of redefining marriage aren't necessarily disagreeing with the homosexual lifestyle -- homosexuals just happen to be the ones who are trying to change the fundamental definition of marriage. I would venture to say that most opponents of same-sex marriage don't put sexual orientation in the same category as race or gender, either. So you can drop that prophesy and spend more time declaring that there will be a draft or that the Diebold machines rigged the election.

More defense of my vote later.

I couldn't decide what to post first after the election, because I have so many thoughts, so I just didn't say anything for a couple of days. Finally, I've decided to go with the most disgraceful first. After Michael Moore was silent for awhile after the election, he finally posted his first thoughts. I wonder how many of those brave men and women would appreciate being used on the site of a man who has done so much to smear their commander in chief? Of course, I'm sure some of the troops are against Bush and the war. But since our military is still voluntary and will remain that way, I'll bet that many soldiers signed up for duty because they love the United States of America so much that they'd die to protect it, and because they love freedom so much that they would die to spread it. I have so much respect for them.

From Bush's victory comforts troops in the Washington Times:

The soldiers said they appreciated Mr. Bush's get-tough style and feared that Mr. Kerry would have pulled out of Iraq before finishing the mission.

"John Kerry has always just been weak," said Army Sgt. Tod Feegan of South Dakota. "He's always wanted to negotiate his way out of things."

He said serving in Iraq has taught him a thing or two about the people here and how to manage the country.

"This country, after so many years under Saddam Hussein, the only thing they understand is strength," Sgt. Feegan said. "And if you show weakness, they're never going to get in line."

I can't even say how much I appreciate our troops, and how proud I am to be an American right now.

I also noticed that Michael Moore linked to a mosaic of President Bush that is made up of small pictures of all of the soldiers who have died in Iraq. I wonder if anyone has made a mosaic of Moore, made up of small pictures of all of our soldiers who died in order to secure his freedom to spread mistruths about the government like he does? I think that guy is so vile.

I adore beauty products. Browsing around in a CVS is one of my favorite pastimes, sadly. I'm a sucker for "New! Nuevo!" That said, I decided that I really should step away from Sephora.com, because I'm spending way too much money on attempting to be pretty.

Then, what do I get in the mail today? A Sephora catalog. Couple that with the fact that Allure magazine's "Best of Beauty" is out this month, and resistance is futile. *sigh*

Majority RUUUUUULES!

I have such increased hope for America when I see this! Of course I realize that not everyone made their choice for Bush based on moral issues, but according to exit polls, many did. And to me, this is a picture of traditional values that I thought we'd lost. I'll have much more to say about the issues of same-sex marriage, abortion, and embryonic stem cell research later ... there are some arguments that I've seen today that I am itching to counter. But for now, just this encouraging picture!

Also, I saw another picture posted somewhere by a Kerry supporter:

Although I'm sure it wasn't the intent of the creator, this is even more encouraging to me. I know there were a lot of prayers uttered about this election ... speaking for myself, it weighed so heavily on my heart. My prayer was that those who support the ACLU and the groups that mean to extinguish God from all aspects of public life would be removed from positions of great influence, and He answers prayers. Moving to "Jesusland" on November 14, 1993 was the single most important decision I've ever made. He's real, folks.

The good and the bad of Hot Topic

I discovered the other day that Hot Topic doesn't smell like patchouli anymore! Hooray! I love that place, but I always had to speed through in 2 minutes or the amount of time between a huge inhale and my lungs exploding, whichever is less. That is one horrid smell ... I almost prefer Eau de Clostridium sporogenes. Almost.

Now, if they'd just bring back my Goonies Never Say Die shirt. They only had one when I discovered it, and it was an XXXXXXS, which would only fit around my thumb. Snugly. To be fair, they did have that slogan with a different design, but the colors were a little too 80s (like, neon green, pink, and orange). In order to wear those colors, I'd have to buy a pair of black high-top sneakers with one neon orange lace and one neon pink lace. And I just don't have that kind of money or that kind of horrifying taste.

It is so heartening to see that the majority of Americans, millions of Americans, were not swayed by the Vote for Change tour (although I do love me some Dave!) the far left propaganda by people like Michael Moore and George Soros, the shrieking by Al Gore and Ted Kennedy, and all of the Hollywood elite. I was sickened by the thought that those people represented the mentality of most of America.

Congratulations President Bush, and everyone who worked so tirelessly, running an excellent ground game to pull in a huge popular vote (via Blogs For Bush).

I hope the President lives up to the expectations of the millions who turned out in droves to support him, and I think it's likely that he will. God bless America! Yippeeeeeeeeee!

Edited because it helps to use the correct link, as opposed to one that leads to gibberish.

Make it So!

I've been skimming the open thread on the KE04 blog, and all the civil war talk and anger and hatred is freaking me out just a tad. We have this wonderful, wonderful democracy, where 120 million people can vote freely without fearing for their lives, and information about the candidates and the issues is at every voter's fingertips. This country is so blessed, we just don't even realize how many people would love to experience a process like we did today.

But because we have this great democracy and more than one person is on the ballot, someone has to lose. Reading through other areas of that blog, it makes me sad that so many placed all of their hopes on John Kerry, who turned out to be a terrible candidate. I hope the economy continues to grow. I hope tax relief is permanent. I hope all children get access to healthcare. I hope the elderly get their prescriptions and that everyone who worked so hard for their Social Security can reap the rewards that they deserve. I hope all of the people who are in desperate medical or financial situations tonight, who despair to see a Bush victory, are pleasantly surprised when their situations begin to look up. I hope our troops, those brave young people that I saw tonight in Fallujah, and all over the world, know how proud we are of them, and I hope they are energized to keep fighting so that others can be as blessedly free as we are in America.

Thank You, God, for Your blessings on the United States of America! I pray for blessings for our President in his 2nd term, and that Americans will remember all of the things that we have in common. Lord, please make it so.

Poor Brit Hume, he's the sleepiest thing I've ever seen. Also, the guy from the Weekly Standard looks eerily like Richard Dreyfuss.

And I would love to be a fly on the wall in Michael Moore's house tonight (provided he's home, of course. Otherwise that would be really boring.) I'm sure there are some interestingly crazy conspiracy theories buzzing around him.

I guess P. Diddy wasn't as influential as once thought. From the Associated Press, via Powerline:

One in 10 voters were casting ballots for the first time and fewer than 10 percent were young voters, hardly the groundswell that experts had predicted. Kerry was favored by both groups, according to the surveys conducted for The Associated Press by Edison Media Research and Mitofsky International.

I don't want to discourage people from voting, of course, but I'm afraid that my generation was misinformed by people like Michael Moore. I've been checking his site for amusement, like this message to first-time voters:

And they are going to make it difficult for you to vote. The new law says if this is your first time voting you must bring ID with you that matches the address you are registered at.

Awwww! Actually, I think that's called maintaining the integrity of the system.

The Redskins loss may be a true predictor after all?

I was talking to a friend today about the Redskins connection to the re-election of an incumbent, and I told her that it's almost certain that the trend will continue for this election. According to a lot of screeching by the left, Bush isn't the real president anyway. He stole the election from Gore, remember? So that means that the Redskins loss = Gore loses again this time. Right?

Also, this is a good answer to "When will I knooooooooow?!?!??!"

An hour-by-hour guide to tonight's results by John Fund

Found the link at Instapundit.

I love how kids just tell you random things. BF and I were watching the SNL Presidential Bash with his dad, his niece (9) and nephew (4). His nephew turns to me and says excitedly, "We have a leaf blower in the garage!" I said, "Really???" with as much enthusiasm as anyone between the ages of five and 55 can muster over a leaf blower.

A minute or so later, he exclaims, "It blows leaves!" I said, "That does sound like something a leaf blower would do."

I really need to learn how to have conversations with 4-year-olds.

I also must stop refreshing realclearpolitics.com.

Why are they running?

I truly believe John Kerry wants to be President of the United States. But I have a problem with what I believe to be the reason behind his desire ... it seems to me that he wants to be President of the United States just so that he can be President of the United States. I think he wants the title, not the position. As far as I can tell, he doesn't have a vision for America and a passionate plan to bring that vision to fruition, unless you count his vision of America with John Kerry as president. To bring about that vision, he's paying close attention to opinion polls, saying what he believes voters want to hear and pandering to certain ethnic and religious groups that are seen as critical voting blocs. He's also smearing his opponent in every possible way, distorting George Bush's weaknesses to make them appear huge, and spreading mistruths. And of course, he's sidestepping the issues and dancing all around his contradictory record. (You're going to hunt down and kill the terrorists? Really? Then why did you vote against the death penalty for terrorists who kill Americans?)

In contrast, I believe that George W. Bush has a vision for America as a nation of responsible, prosperous people. A nation that brings liberty and freedom to hopeless parts of the world, sending resources and aid to areas that are sick and suffering. A nation where we will NOT be enslaved in our own country, afraid to leave our homes because we don't know where the terrorists will strike next. I don't understand those who accuse him of concocting a war for political gain, because he was an extremely popular president before the Iraq invasion, and would have won re-election easily if he hadn't done so. But he believed it was necessary for our safety, for our reputation of spreading liberty, and those things trumped the fact that it was unpopular according to some.

Kerry reminds me of those people that go to medical school because they love the idea of saying that they're a med student, of having "Dr." in front of their name, of the money and the prestige. It has been my experience that this type of doctor, and you can tell who they are fairly quickly, are not nearly as good at medicine as the other type of doctor. The other type has a different motivation ... they are good at science and they feel called to ease human suffering, so they sacrifice the personal time and the hours of work and study, they learn the material, and are much more effective at treating their patients.

I see Kerry as the type that will do just enough to scrape by, and then send you a bill. George Bush, on the other hand, strikes me as more of the type that will do what is necessary to heal.