American Idol Top 12

I missed Jessica Sierra and I only heard Anwar's last note. Anwar looked good, but he may have sounded like crap on a cracker - I have no idea. The recap clips at the end were good for both, though, especially Anwar. Anyway.

• Mikalah Gordon - Son of a Preacher Man by Dusty Springfield
  See, she just annoys me. It sounded like she sang out of her nose. And she reminds me of Mike Myers's SNL character Linda Richman of Coffee Talk. You know, the one who says that everything is like buttah, and gets verklempt over Barbra Streisand despite her idiotic foreign policy declarations.
• Constantine Maroulis - You've Made Me So Very Happy by ... I don't know. Blood Sweat and Tears, maybe?
  Voice sounds MUCH better, there's still altogether too much ch*st ha*r (I'm afraid typing that too much makes it come to life. You know, like Beetlejuice) and dude just skeezed all over the stage. Ew. Oh look, Constantine just turned Simon into a giggly mess. That was a little creepy. Did Ryan just say that he needs heels when he stands beside Constantine? Ack. That's also creepy, and a very unfortunate mental image. By the way, the four-year-old mini-Constantine in the audience just did a great set of devil horns.
• Lindsey Cardinale - Knock on Wood by Eddie Floyd
  Hey, I remember this song, Kimberly Caldwell shouted it at us in American Idol 2. As for Lindsey, it was boring and forgettable.
• Anthony Federov - Breaking Up is Hard to Do, Neil Sedaka's lullaby version
  Sounded good, but he could have picked a much better song. C'mon man, pick more interesting songs because I like your voice - or else, I may actually have a reason to want to smack him on the back of the head. You know what I think it is? I think I want to smack him just to see if I could knock him down, because I think I could.
• Nadia Turner - You Don't Have to Say You Love Me by Dusty Springfield
  She might be my favorite female singer. But she has a Tina Turner mouth - actually, an Angela Bassett as Tina Turner mouth.
• Bo Bice - Spinning Wheel by Blood, Sweat and Tears
  Someone should tell him that he can take the microphone out of the stand - he doesn't have to carry the entire stand all over the place. Or maybe that's a rocker thing, carrying stuff. I thought his voice was better tonight - maybe the larger venue suits he and Constantine better than the small one.
• Vonzell Solomon - Anyone Who Had a Heart by ...? Dusty Springfield? Cilla Black?
  Sounded good, but her stage movements are weird and jerky - it was like watching American Idol/UCA Cheerleading Championships. Also, was that R. Kelly in her family & friends section?
• Scott Savol - Ain't Too Proud to Beg by The Temptations
  Heh, I caught a glimpse of Nigel Lythgoe awkwardly rocking out in the audience. That was a good performance, I was pleasantly surprised. Scott's, not Nigel's. Is it me, or does he only have one facial expression?
• Carrie Underwood - When Will I Be Loved by The Everly Brothers
  That sounded completely out of tune, or it could be that I'm an idiot.
• Nikko Smith - I Want You Back by The Jackson 5
  Hey, his beef jerky hat is back. Well, briefly - long enough for him to throw it. This is one of those songs that when I hear it, I must dance. Those flashing squares in the background are going to give me a seizure. And I'm very sorry that a small rodent has been gnawing on his lapel. Unfortunately, though, Simon is right - he just sounded average.

Oh look, it's Nina on House M.D. Scott would be enthused by that. The end.