2008 Democratic National Convention

Via an email from Dad - and as he says, "Not meant to offend." It's just funny.

• 7:00 P.M. Opening flag burning.
• 7:15 P.M. Pledge of allegiance to U.N.
• 7:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
• 7:30 till 8:00 P.M. Nonreligious prayer and worship. Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton.
• 8:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
• 8:05 P.M. Ceremonial tree hugging.
• 8:15- 8:30 P.M. Gay Wedding - Barney Frank, presiding.
• 8:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
• 8:35 P.M. Free Saddam Rally. Cindy Sheehan & Susan Sarandon.
• 9:00 P.M. Keynote speech. The proper etiquette for surrender - French President Jacques Chirac
• 9:15 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
• 9:20 P.M. Collection to benefit Osama Bin Laden kidney transplant fund.
• 9:30 P.M. Unveiling of plan to free freedom fighters from Guantanamo Bay - Sean Penn.
• 9:40 P.M. Why I Hate the Military - a short talk by William Jefferson Clinton.
• 9:45 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
• 9:50 P.M. Dan Rather presented Truth in Broadcasting award by Michael Moore.
• 9:55 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
• 10:00 P.M. How George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld brought down the World Trade Center Towers - Howard Dean.
• 10:30 P.M. Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton by Mahmud Ahmadinejad.
• 11:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
• 11:05 P.M. Al Gore reinvents the Internet.
• 11:15 P.M. Our Troops are War Criminals - John Kerry.
• 11:30 P.M. Coronation of Mrs. Rodham Clinton.
• 12:00 A.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
• 12:05 A.M. Bill asks Ted to drive Hillary home

Trolls, stay under your bridge. Please.