I'm not dead y'all.

I'm just busily intermittently seeing patients while sometimes doing nothing, and also trying to keep up with my fake medication regimen (more later).

There's much to tell*, but my brain, it has shut down for the night. I just wanted to say hi. I missed you, faithful readers. Let's see, is there anything I can tell you real quick? Oh yes, a little exchange between Scott and me while we were at dinner at Logan's the other night.

Me: So I was supposed to have clinic, but Dr. Psychiatrist-Who-Was-Covering-Student-Clinic was out of town and there was no clinic, so I was just there for consults.
Him: I think it's funny that you say "CON-sults".
Me: What am I supposed to say?
Him: It's con-SULTS.
Me: No it isn't - I've never heard anyone say it that way when they're using it as a noun.
Waiter: Do you need a refill?
Me: Yeah, thanks. (I drink diet cola like a fish. A fat fish.)
Him: That doesn't mean it's right. It's like how everyone says trans-alkyl something, when they're talking about that one thing, and it's really supposed to be blahdeblah and ghosh instead of trans, because of single bonds and something-or-other. (I love him, but I just don't always know what he's talking about - and sometimes I forget the actual words so I have to make them up.)
Me: Oh.
Him: Yeah. Like that.
Me: Well, they say CON-sults on House. And ER. And in real life.

So I looked it up. It turns out that you CAN pronounce it "CON-sult" if you're using it as a noun, but it's the second pronounciation after "con-SULT". Well, that's just stupid. Nobody says it that way. Isn't it sad that Scott and I have settled numerous arguments with a dictionary? We're such giant dorks.

By the way, I PASSED THE FREAKING USMLE STEP ONE! Yaaaaay! More on school stuff later.

*Risk management people or whoever you are, stop looking at me! I'm not going to violate HIPAA, okay? As usual, it's going to be all about meeeeeeee.

An unfortunate guest lecturer, and Dave Matthews on House EEEEEE!

Hey, you know what I keep forgetting to tell y'all? While perusing my pharmacology lecture schedule (which is a completely interesting thing to do during class sometimes) I discovered that one of our required lectures (on dermatologic pharmacology) is to be given by none other than my ex-dermatologist who doesn't know how to use lasers or treat patients like real people. I will, of course, be completely professional and sit there and take notes like the good adequate medical student that I am, unless she tries to describe in detail how to use a hair-removal laser. Or how to deal with a patient that you have permanently scarred and left looking like Elvis, now and forever. If that happens, then I'll just quietly put down my Family Guy pen (thanks Joyce!) and think about kittens or something.

In other news, Dave Matthews was on House MD this week, in the episode Half Wit (there's an mpeg file in downloads) and it was so good ... I don't know, I can't come up with an analogy. It was just really good. When both House and Dave were sitting at the piano in Dave's hospital room, my head almost exploded. I couldn't handle having both of them in the same frame. It's a good thing I was doing my evil genetics homework and wasn't completely rapt.

I have two exams on Monday and two on Tuesday (and a nervous breakdown somewhere in there) so I may be scarce for a few days. Don't miss me too much.

Oh! Something else I meant to tell you. Harvey at IMAO is snarking on West Virginia, and it's terribly funny. Go read it. Here's a couple of my favorites:

The state motto of West Virginia is "Montani semper liberi", which is Latin for "Sister, daughter, wife... whatever".

The variety of apple known as Golden Delicious originated in Wellsburg, West Virginia, in 1775. It was greeted with overwhelming enthusiasm by a population who'd spent years being stuck with eating the Ochre Atrocious.

In May, 1860, the first oil well in West Virginia was drilled at Burning Springs. In June, 1860, the former governor of Texas invaded West Virginia and stole it.

In a recent survey, 95% of West Virginians report having checked out a book from their local public library within the last year. During the same time period, 95% of West Virginians also reported having found a way to fix that wobbly kitchen table with the short leg.

The state flag of West Virginia consists of a blue-edged white background, overlaid by an image of two men debating whether Fahrenheit 9/11 or An Inconvenient Truth was a bigger load of crap.

Dave Matthews on House? Squeeeee!

I read in TV Guide this week that Dave Matthews is going to be a guest star (i.e., Patient of the Week) on House M.D. in March. He'll play a pianist. Oh man, my head may explode. I am endlessly entertained by them both.

In other House news, there was a good song at the end of tonight's episode - Grey Room by Damien Rice (iTunes). I Googled the lyrics and then added it to my iTunes cart.

Speaking of lyrics - some particular lyrics of one of my favorite songs in the world, Long Ride Home by Patty Griffin (iTunes - go preview it at least - Patty Griffin is amazing) have been really hitting home with me lately:

Forty years go by with someone lying in your bed
Forty years of things you say you wish you'd never said
How hard would it have been to say some kinder words instead
I wonder as I stare up at the sky turning red

I've had some time to think about you
And watch the sun sink like a stone
I've had some time to think about you
On the long ride home

Headlights staring at the driveway
The house is dark as it can be
I go inside and all is silent
It seems as empty as the inside of me ...

I guess I'm grateful for life's ebbs and flows - it makes you appreciate the good times when you have to go through bad ones. But still - sometimes, I just feel emotionally drained - like I just have nothing left to give.

*sign*

New mpg files for download

Update - 11/25/07: Files Removed. Don't hate on me, blame GoDaddy.

I've added some new files to the server in the past few days - here's a list, to help Googlers who are looking for them. Sorry for the dry post! P.S. - I have two exams on Monday (Pathology & Patient Care) and two on Tuesday (Psychopathology & Immunology) so I'll be scarce for a few days. Don't miss me too much. :-) We have:

House MD, Season 3, episode 2 - Cane and Able (aired on September 12, 2006)
House and the team treat a young boy who claims there is a tracking device in his neck and believes he has been the subject of alien experimentation. Cameron is outraged when she learns Cuddy and Wilson have been lying to House about the diagnosis on his last case (episode summary from TV.com).

House M.D., Season 3, episode 3 - Informed Consent (aired on September 19, 2006)
House puts a well-known medical researcher through a battery of tests to determine why he collapsed in his lab. When the team is unable to diagnose the problem, the doctor asks the team to help him end his life. House is forced to use his cane again after the ketamine has worn off as he deals with a clinic patient's teenaged daughter who has a crush on him (episode summary from TV.com).

House MD, Season 3, episode 4 - Lines in the Sand (aired on September 26, 2006)
When doctors are unable to diagnose why a severely autistic boy screams loudly for no apparent reason, House takes the case. As the boy's condition worsens, it becomes obvious that House relates to the boy because he has no social niceties (episode summary from TV.com).

Saturday Night Live - Ellen Degeneres and No Doubt (aired December 15, 2001)

Family Guy, Season 6, episode 1 - Mother Tucker (aired on September 17, 2006)
Peter's mom gets a divorce. Peter feels abandoned until he sees a father figure in his mom's new boyfriend, Tom Tucker. Meanwhile, Brian gets his own NPR style show on the radio(episode summary from TV.com).

You know, I wish Clay Aiken would just come out (pardon the pun) and answer the gay question already. Just a yes or no. Not that it matters to me - I still love his voice, I just won't love his morals if the answer is yes. But doesn't he get that by refusing to answer the question, most people assume the answer is "yes"?

Surely he gets that. He's a smart cookie. (But what was with the short-lived stubble which made its debut on Leno? Has Clay been watching too much House MD?)

Also, calling Diane Sawyer "rude" on Good Morning America*? Boo. I like Diane Sawyer. She's supposed to ask intrusive questions, that's her job.

In other Clay news, if you buy the album from iTunes, you get a bonus track called Lover All Alone that is just so pretty. I would have preferred to have a whole album of songs like that, personally.